Daaan

A delightful English lad who takes you on a whirlwind tour of Englands hu-wheat fields, grassy knolls, and prancing ponies before settling down for a glorious cup of tea betwixt the daffodils. Finally, as the sun goes down, he makes you a man by taking you gently from behind, and you finish the day off with a handful of cucumber and dickshit sandwiches.